<I>You May</I> Not <I>Tie an Alligator to a Fire Hydrant</I> is a collection of the 101 dumbest real federal, city, and state laws in America, compiled by Jeff Koon and Andy Powell, a couple of high school seniors with a Web site visited by hundreds of thousands of browsers every month. These laws will astonish, possibly outrage, and certainly amuse citizens everywhere. <P> Here you will learn that forgetting to close a gate is against the law in Nevada; that flying a kite is illegal in Schaumburg, Illinois; and that shaking carpets in the street in Cambridge, Massachusetts, is strictly forbidden. You probably haven't tried cutting off your arm to make people feel sorry for you -- but if you live in Alabama, it is against the law. Many Texans will be surprised to learn that their hoes must be no less than four feet long. Perhaps more disturbingly, Indianans will be forced to recognize that being sexually aroused in public could get them arrested. With so many potential legal pitfalls around us all, it is comforting, finally, to learn in these pages that, in Alaska, the people who make laws have sagely concluded that emergencies are "held to a minimum and are rarely found to exist." <P> This hilarious compilation features forty-six original illustrations by award-winning artist Ward Schumaker that brilliantly capture the absurdity of so many of our laws with a light and elegant touch. <P> <CENTER><BLOCKQUOTE>WARNING <P> These laws, all verified by the authors and presented along with a reference to the corresponding federal, state, or city statute, may cause readers to lose any desire to pursue a career in law.</BLOCKQUOTE></CENTER>